Manage Emotions

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Losing control of your emotions (情绪) can be frightening. One moment you are angry, and the next you are breaking objects, hurting yourself, or even hurting others. When the storm passes, deep regret and shame  (羞耻) often follow. Why does this happen, and how can we stop it?

情绪失控可能令人恐惧。前一秒你还在生气，下一秒你就摔东西、伤害自己，甚至伤害他人。当暴风雨过去后，深深的懊悔和羞耻感常常随之而来。为什么会这样？我们又如何才能制止它？

From a psychological (心理学) perspective (角度), emotional explosions  (爆发) are closely connected to the brain. There is a small area called the amygdala (杏仁核), which works like an alarm system. When we face danger or stress, it reacts instantly (瞬间) , preparing our body to fight or run away. However, sometimes this alarm system becomes too sensitive (敏感) . When we are tired, under pressure, or full of negative (负面) feelings, the amygdala (杏仁核) may treat a small problem as a huge threat. It takes over the rational part of our brain called the prefrontal cortex (前额叶皮层), which helps us think clearly and make wise decisions. This is known as amygdala hijack (杏仁核劫持). In this state, our actions are driven by pure emotion, not by reason. We lose control because the brain’s emergency (紧急) system has temporarily (暂时) switched off our thinking ability.

从心理学角度看，情绪爆发与大脑密切相关。有一个叫做杏仁核的小区域，它就像一个警报系统。当我们面临危险或压力时，它会瞬间作出反应，让我们的身体准备战斗或逃跑。然而，有时这个警报系统会变得过于敏感。当我们疲惫、有压力或充满负面情绪时，杏仁核可能会把小问题当作巨大威胁。它会接管我们大脑中称为前额叶皮层的理性部分，而前额叶皮层本应帮助我们清晰地思考和做出明智的决定。这就是所谓的“杏仁核劫持”。在这种状态下，我们的行为由纯粹的情绪驱动，而不是理性。我们失去控制，是因为大脑的应急系统暂时关闭了我们的思考能力。

Another reason we feel so regretful afterwards is the gap between our actions and our values. When we calm down, the rational brain wakes up again, and we clearly see what we have done. The shame and guilt become a heavy burden. This can even form a cycle: we lose control, feel bad about ourselves, become more stressed, and then lose control again more easily.

事后我们感到如此后悔的另一个原因，是我们的行为与价值观之间的落差。当我们冷静下来，理性大脑再次苏醒，我们清楚地看到自己做了什么。羞耻和内疚成为沉重的负担。这甚至会形成一个循环：我们失控，自我感觉糟糕，压力增大，然后更容易再次失控。

So how can we learn to control our emotions? First, recognize (识别) the early signs. When you feel your heart beating faster, your face heating up, or your fists tightening, these are warning signals. At this moment, stop and take slow, deep breaths. This sends a message to the brain that there is no real danger, which lowers the alarm level. Second, press the pause button. Leave the situation for a while if possible. Take a short walk, drink some cold water, or count numbers from thirty down to zero. This gives the rational part of your brain time to return to work. Third, express your feelings in safe ways. Write in a diary, talk to someone you trust, or do some exercise like running or playing basketball. Physical activity releases energy and helps restore emotional balance.

那么，我们怎样才能学会控制情绪呢？首先，识别早期信号。当你感到心跳加快、脸颊发热或拳头握紧时，这些都是警告信号。此时，停下来，做缓慢而深长的呼吸。这会向大脑传递“没有真正危险”的信息，从而降低警报级别。其次，按下暂停键。如果可能，暂时离开当前的情境。散一小会儿步，喝点冷水，或者从三十倒数到零。这能让大脑的理性部分有时间恢复工作。第三，用安全的方式表达感受。写日记，和你信任的人交谈，或者做一些运动，比如跑步、打篮球。体育活动能释放能量，帮助恢复情绪平衡。

Finally, remember that emotions are like waves. They rise, peak, and fall. You cannot stop the wave, but you can learn to ride it. Every time you successfully calm yourself down, you strengthen your ability to control your emotions. You are the master of your mind, and with patience and practice, you can build a peaceful and strong heart.

最后，请记住，情绪就像波浪。它们会升起、达到顶峰，然后落下。你无法阻挡波浪，但你可以学会驾驭它。每一次成功让自己冷静下来，你都会增强控制情绪的能力。你是自己心灵的主人，凭借耐心和练习，你一定能铸就一颗平静而强大的心。